A Story For "Autumn Leaves"

The "Autumn Leaves" Concept

All things come and go. Pain and joy are not permanent. Take this sentiment and sit with it. Breathe it in your lungs.

"Life changes like Autumn Leaves"

If you are able, try looking back. Here are some things that helped me.

One: Kindness. I give my past self and her actions patience and kindness. She didn't know what I know now. She, like I am today, was also trying her best.

Two: Be cautious of the memories you let into your mind. When I get lost in my memories, I am transported to the spaces and feelings I held during that time. Sometimes, opening a door when I am not ready can make me feel like I am trapped in that experience.

Three: I try to think of the present day from the viewpoint of someone 10 years in the future. How does this put things in perspective? What does this make me want to do differently?

Backstory

I have always been a notebook lover, on the verge of obsessive.

When I was young, I loved glitter and cheesy sayings about believing in your inner sparkle. I now have a soft spot for earthy tones and more open-ended flowers.

As time went by, my collection grew and grew and grew. By the time I turned 20, I had a bin full of notebooks filled with songs, poems, and personal theories starting from when I was 8 years old.

I didn't have the space anymore to hold them, and I had a hard time choosing what to keep and what not to. I decided that I would consolidate the notebooks into a big binder. It was one of the most beneficial experiences of self-discovery and forgiveness.

It truly taught me the beauty of time itself. The present can feel all-consuming. These feelings can weigh heavy on us, the sense of being stuck in a stifling or scary place. The truth is, all things must change. All good, all hardships and all joys will change, grow, and leave.

I may have a massive notebook collection, but I know that modern technology has given the majority a trove of their past; we have a digital horde of photos, voice memos, and notes apps.

Sometimes, it can be a gift to be able to look back and see how you have changed and ponder on what you would like to become.